How to Deal More Easily with Criticism: Tips for Sensitive ‘Good Girls’

If you identify with Good Girl Syndrome or consider yourself a highly sensitive person, criticism can feel incredibly overwhelming—sometimes even crushing. Whether it’s coming from family, friends, or coworkers, negative feedback often sparks self-doubt, anxiety, and emotional turmoil.

But what if criticism didn’t have to shake your confidence?

In this blog, you’ll discover why criticism is often more about the other person than it is about you—and how to respond with compassion and clarity. You’ll learn gentle, practical tools to protect your self-esteem while staying grounded on your healing journey.

Why Criticism Hurts So Much

Criticism can feel piercing, especially if you grew up learning to please others or avoid conflict. For sensitive women and those living with Good Girl conditioning, being told you're wrong, flawed, or "too much" can quickly spiral into shame, guilt, or people-pleasing.

But before you internalize someone’s words, it’s helpful to explore what criticism really is—and what it isn’t.

What Is Criticism, Really? (Hint: It’s Often Projection)

Most of the time, criticism isn’t about you. It’s a reflection of the other person’s worldview—their beliefs, wounds, and unmet needs.

This psychological pattern is known as projection: where someone unconsciously projects their own insecurities, fears, or experiences onto you. What they’re criticizing in you may be something unresolved in themselves.

A Personal Example:

When I was a new mother, my mother-in-law often criticized me for breastfeeding. At the time, I doubted myself and eventually stopped earlier than I had wanted to.

Later, I realized she had bottle-fed her own children because that was the norm back then. Her judgment wasn’t really about me—it was about her experience, her reality.

Recognizing this helped me take her words less personally and stay anchored in my truth.

How to Respond to Criticism with Compassion and Clarity

Here are a few simple but powerful steps to help you deal more easily with criticism:

1. Pause and Breathe

Take a moment to ground yourself. Breathe deeply before responding.

2. Remember: It’s Their Opinion, Not the Truth

Ask yourself:

“Is this true for me?”
“Does this reflect who I really am?”

Criticism is a reflection of someone else's perspective—not an absolute fact.

3. Decide What to Keep and What to Release

You don’t have to carry every opinion. Visualize their words floating down a stream or blowing away in the wind. You can choose what stays with you—and what doesn’t.

Why This Is Especially Important for Sensitive ‘Good Girls’

If you’ve spent years trying to be liked, avoid conflict, or gain approval, it makes sense that criticism hits a nerve. It challenges the identity you were conditioned to maintain.

But here’s the truth: your worth is not determined by anyone else’s opinion.

Learning to see criticism as projection is a powerful act of emotional self-protection. It helps you set healthier boundaries, stay grounded in your values, and begin to heal the habit of over-apologizing or self-editing.

Criticism doesn’t have to define you. When you understand its true nature and respond with self-compassion, you protect your emotional wellbeing—and move closer to the free, authentic version of yourself.

Final Thoughts

Criticism can be painful—but it doesn’t have to control your emotions or shape your identity. By learning to view criticism through the lens of projection and self-compassion, you can let go of what isn’t yours and reclaim your peace.

These mindful tools are especially powerful for women healing from Good Girl Syndrome—who are used to shrinking themselves in the face of disapproval. You can learn to trust your inner wisdom and stand tall in your truth.

💛 Ready to start this journey?
If this blog stirred something in you—if you're beginning to notice the quiet ways you’ve been silencing yourself or giving too much—you’re not alone.

Come join me for the UNMASKING THE GOOD GIRL Workshop, where we dive deeper into the roots of Good Girl Syndrome and learn how to break free from self-judgment, burnout, and approval-seeking.
It’s time to reclaim your voice, your power, and your peace.

Warmly

Joanne

Joanne Deaker is a Somatic & Arts Therapist who specializes in helping highly sensitive, deeply caring women break free from the Good Girl Syndrome — a debilitating pattern of overgiving.

With training in both somatic therapy and in arts therapy, Joanne combines creative and body-based tools with deep personal experience to guide women in reconnecting with their true selves.

Having lived through some major life transitions, Joanne understands what it feels like to be lost and disconnected. She’s walked the path of recovery from Good Girl Syndrome herself, and now helps others reclaim their time, energy, and sense of self.